Madame Anna Russell first revealed these pearls of musical wisdom to New
York audiences in 1958.
On this occasion, she begins her oration by covering Poetry in the
Cellar with Jazz. "They read all kinds of way out poetry with the
musicians clinkering behind," states Anna. "I imagine it is done by the angry
young men or possibly the beat generation
I thought that meant beat-up
but I am told that it doesn't mean that at all; it means beatific. Of course,
I suppose if you get sufficiently beat up you could become beatific from
the point of view of being slap-happy
However the whole thing is very
existential" So, wearing her existential glasses Ms Russell proceeds to read
two such poems: 'My Ear', about a well adjusted young lady who nevertheless
has a left ear that behaves strangely - it changes into a gardenia but when
it turns into a cauliflower she has to consult an ear and throat specialist
who runs screamimg from his surgery and joins the used car business. The
other poem asks the question who killed 'The Rubens Woman'
and Where
is Whistler's Mother?
Madam Russell then turns her attention to Backwards with the Folk
Song. She reminds us that the definition of the folk song is "Uncouth
vocal utterances of the people about the cares and joys of ordinary life
extemporised by the singer accompanying himself on a simple instrument."
Anna then goes on to observe: "I don't see this going on, do you?. Researchers
dredge the Kentucky Mountains, and pry into the archives of the museums and
libraries
and then they accompany themselves on dulcimers and lutes
- anything but simple instruments. They have to because (a) they can't find
the simple instruments - or (b) if they do nobody can play them - or (c)
if you do find out how to play them they're so antique they fall apart on
you
. Then people start societies for the protection of this sort of
thing which the general public refuse to go to on account of it all being
too arty. So the folk song has now become the complete opposite of what it
started out to be namely - the uncouth vocal utterances of the people
!"
Madam Russell then assails our ears with five typical folk songs: 'A Lily
Maid Sat Making Moan' ("I am the Lady Fripple - Frop and my husband did me
dirt
); 'Old Mother Slipper Slopper' whose milk keeps turning sour;
'Ricky Ticky' with advice on how to carve up the family belongings through
divorce; 'I'm sitting in the bar alone', described as one of the "self-pitying-
---school" songs ("I was once a movie star now I sit alone in the bar");
and finally 'Jolly Old Sigmund Freud' in which the singer tells why she killed
the cat and blackened her husband's eye.
We then have two lectures on instruments. We are told everything about the
French Horn including how to blow down it - "make a raspberry or Bronx Cheer
at one end." We are also told it is not a very nice instrument for ladies
because it could skid on their lipstick
"but if there is one lying
around the house it makes a very smart hat!" The Bagpipe comes under scrutiny
next. "Once I asked audiences to guess what it was but I had to give that
up because some of the guesses, well
"
The grand climax of the programme is a detailed description of Verdi's
Hamleto (or Prosciuttino). Madam Russell begins by
admitting, " Now Verdi has made operas out of many of the Shakespeare plays.
He has not as a matter of fact made one out of Hamlet but I am not,
for a moment going to let that stand in my way." She tells us that Hamlet
is a fantastically complicated story but there would have been no story at
all had Hamlet avenged his father's death at once instead of hinkle pinkling
around.
"Which just goes to show if you don't behave as you ought to you are liable
to be terribly interesting!" Anna then spends nearly half an hour analysing
this production singing all the parts on the way. We learn for instance that
Polonias like Wotan (remember him from The Ring reviewed last month?) is
also a crashing bore and that Ophelia is a little weak in the head - "
so
naturally she is a coloratura soprano. We also learn about the Queen's big
Arras.
Absolutely hilarious.
Reviewer
Ian Lace